


Thanks for getting involved in our love life (that was super cool and mature of you)

by cori_the_bloody



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-06
Updated: 2015-11-06
Packaged: 2018-04-30 08:01:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5156285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cori_the_bloody/pseuds/cori_the_bloody
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jeff and Annie confront the writers about their tragic, lost love. This is 100% foolishness, a crackfic through and through</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thanks for getting involved in our love life (that was super cool and mature of you)

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** These character's belong to Dan Harmon, etc., etc. I simply enjoy manipulating them.  
>  **Author's Note:** Thank you, thank you, thank you to bethanyactually, who is both the [inspiration](http://catty-words.tumblr.com/post/132602566175/sohpiabush-jeff-and-annie-appreciation-week-day) and beta for this fic. One of my favorite lines exists solely because she is awesome. I hope this makes you giggle, dear reader.

"I let you go, Annie, with my hands and my head. The heart, which cynics say is code for penis, wants what it wants. But I let you go."

"Wait," Annie holds up her hand to stop him, visibly confused. "What the hell?"

"What?" Jeff asks, shaken out of his melodramatic confession.

“Something doesn’t feel right.”

"Is it the ‘penis’ aside? Seems kind of out of place, huh? I mean, we've spent six years establishing that you _are_ dead sexy. This should be more about how I'm hopelessly and genuinely in love with you. Emphasis on ‘hopeless’."

Her face softens and she gifts Jeff with that proud, tender smile that she keeps in reserve just for him. "You are?"

He huffs out a breath. "Yeah. And, you know, it feels really good to say it out loud."

"Well, I love you, too."

He looks frankly and openly happy for the first time in two seasons. "That's great!"

"Yeah, it is! So…why are we so angsty right now?"

He frowns, considering. "I don't know. I guess because you're leaving?"

Annie scoffs. "For an _internship_. I'll be gone for ten weeks, but I'm going to come back."

"Huh. Then I guess there's really no good reason. What are you doing?"

"I'm calling Abed." Jeff's about to question her further when she holds up a finger and speaks into the phone. "Hey, Abed, I've got a question for you. Who writes our show?" There's a brief pause. "Well obviously there's a whole team, but who're the main writers?" She mouths a few names to herself. "And they wrote this episode…okay…excellent. Thanks, Abed!"

"What was that about?" Jeff asks.

"I'll explain on the way," Annie promises, grabbing Jeff's hand and tugging him out of the library.

"The way to where?"

Annie quirks one eyebrow at him and he notices the fierce determination in her eyes. That usually means it's best not to question her, to just go along with whatever scheme she's cooked up.

"We're going to visit the Writers' Room."

###

"Then, at the end, we can find out that _Britta_ was the villain all along!"

"You know, that sounds like a great idea. I bet the fans won't at all be outraged that we negated six years of writing to make that canon."

"Whatcha doing?" Annie asks, standing in the doorway of the Writers' Room, leaning against the jamb and crossing her arms. Jeff stands behind her in a similar position, looking imposing.

"We're writing the movie," Dan Harmon says.

Annie rolls her eyes. "Oh for Pete's sake. Don't make Britta a villain. As if you need to send _more_ mixed messages about her characterization."

"Why are you defending her?" Chris McKenna asks. "You two aren't even close."

"And whose fault is that?"

"Female cattiness?" he suggests.

Annie pinches the bridge of her nose. "Oh god, this conversation is already exhausting."

"What are you even doing here?" Dan asks.

Jeff is the one who answers. "We want to know why we don't get together in the last episode."

"Oh." Dan frowns. "Well, that's easy. You guys just aren't in the right place to be dating."

Annie takes a menacing step forward, but Jeff catches her by the shoulder, holding her back. "How do you figure? She's the only person I've ever felt this way about."

"You love her, certainly," Dan allows.

"And she just admitted to loving me, so what's the problem?"

"Wait, you did?" Chris sputters.

Annie shrugs.

"But—but the audience doesn't get to know what Annie's thinking or feeling. It builds the dramatic tension."

"Have you considered that we don't want drama _or_ tension?" Annie asks.

“We’ve had _enough_ needless drama and tension over the past six years,” Jeff adds. “We want to end the tension!”

Annie meets his gaze and smirks, pressing back against him.

Dan scowls. "Stop that! You guys don't get together yet. I already wrote that. You're mucking it up."

"Are we though?" Annie asks in a sweetly condescending tone, narrowing her eyes at him. "We've always supported each other, learning and growing together. We just kind of…fit. There's no point in keeping us apart. I think you’re the one doing the mucking."

"There is a point," he insists. "The point is that you, Annie, are young and optimistic and just starting out as an adult.”

“So what?” Annie throws up her hands in exasperation. “Sure, I’ve done a lot of growing up since I came to Greendale at 18, but no one ever really _stops_ growing. That’s what makes us human. We screw up, we move forward, and we figure stuff out as we go. Besides, I’ve been on my own for a long time now. I don’t need you, or anyone else, to thrust me into adulthood. That ship has sailed.”

“Yeah,” Jeff agrees. “Annie’s always been way more mature than me. She doesn’t need to prove herself as an adult.”

“B-but,” Dan stutters. “You have to go see the world! How could you possibly know you want Jeff Winger right now?"

"Because _I want Jeff Winger right now_."

“But why? I mean, look at him. He's a mess. He's a functional alcoholic stuck in a dead-end job that he doesn't want, and that’s not going to change any time soon. He’s still doing penance for how he behaved before Greendale.”

Annie fumes and Jeff rolls his eyes. “Losing my own firm after actually earning my degree isn’t punishment enough? I renounced my evil ways a long time ago, and it’s not like I ever killed anybody. I’m pretty sure I’d have forgiven myself and moved on by now.”

“It can’t work like that! You’re chronically unhappy and a total jag-off, and it has to stay that way.”

"That’s stupid," Annie says, moving forward again, ready to defend Jeff's honor.

Jeff steps in front of her though, hands on his hips, and glares down at his creator. "Stop projecting yourself onto me. Look, buddy, I get that you're unhappy and that life often kicks you when you're down. But that doesn't mean you're unworthy of love and it doesn’t mean you should stop fighting for what you want. And, well, I want Annie. I’m a better, happier person with her.”

“But she’s so young!” Chris says. “It’ll send the wrong message.”

Annie crosses her arms pops out her hip. “Oh, and having the dean harass Jeff when he’s the lone representative of the LGBTQ community doesn’t?” She holds out a hand and glares when Chris looks like he’s going to interrupt. “And don’t even claim Chang’s eleventh-hour coming out as ‘good representation’.”

Chris gapes.

“Besides,” Jeff points out reasonably, “She’s 25, not 15. I can see why I didn’t ask her out in the first couple of seasons, but now it doesn’t make sense. Do you know what makes a relationship unhealthy and problematic?”

“I assume you’re going to tell us,” Dan says dryly.

“A relationship is unhealthy and problematic when there’s a complete imbalance of power, when one person controls or coerces the other. If there’s an imbalance of power in mine and Annie’s relationship, I am _definitely_ not the one holding more cards or wearing the metaphorical pants. Plus, if Annie ever does abuse her powers, I’ll have no problem calling her out on it. Just like she has no problem telling me when I’m being selfish. We’re a team.”

“Yeah!” Annie agrees.

“I don’t think we’ll be needing you anymore. We’re gonna be just fine, together and happy.”

“We sure are. Though, honestly, that should have been the case since season three.”

Dan and Chris sit in stunned silence.

“Now if you’ll excuse us,” Jeff says, settling his arm around Annie’s shoulders, “we have six years of sexual tension to resolve.”

“You know, satisfying resolutions? Those things people prefer to have at the ends of stories?” Annie raises an eyebrow, all sass.

“You could really learn a thing or two from fanfiction writers,” Jeff says, pulling Annie closer. She slips her arm around his waist and smiles up at him. “We always get a happy ending in _those_ stories. Everybody’s satisfied.”

Dan and Chris continue to blink, dumbfounded.

Jeff and Annie walk out of the room together and don’t look back.


End file.
